party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
