You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
