I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Randomize
