and you said cock pushups were impossible
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Randomize
