Acid is not a monday night drug
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
