You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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