if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
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