Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
