I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
