He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
