If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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