I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Randomize
