I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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