yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
