oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
