my room smells like sperm. sweet.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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