OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
farters have to be the big spoon...
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
