cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
