no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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