i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
