Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
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