Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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