WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
How's work?
Spinning.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I fill condoms, not promises.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize
