Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
