i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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