my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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