Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
too bad you live with your parents still
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
