The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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