This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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