Come see our sink grown plant.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
