why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
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