does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
i think i just lost a toe
last night I used snow as a chaser
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
