its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
