At least make sure they are 18
Why
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
