fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
