Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
