doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
