you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
