Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
