I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Randomize
