so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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