you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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