your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
