you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Randomize
