I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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