idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Randomize
