Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
