she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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