dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
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