MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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